Now the hummer is Wretched Excess, as I stated... But it's the only real SUV they're still selling -- the rest are all soccer mom cars.

...and which Sport or Utility would that be? It's a Military Utility Vehicle. Designed for getting over extreme terrain fast for the sport of killing people, or the utility of setting things up so that other people can kill people more easily. (basically). Ok, so maybe the civilian version could be aimed at paintballers. Yeah, maybe it's the ultimate off-roader, but the term SUV was coined specifically to market the 'soccer-mum cars', and not the Hummers.