OK, Bezos may have sucked the pathetic* sycophants at 60 Minutes into pimping for his fake high-tech dream of drone delivery, but what does this mean? Nothing. A PR stunt with a willing media accomplice.

Well, this actually pisses me off more than you might imagine. Bezos is simply trying to steal some fire from my new Kickstarter campaign for a National Flying Monkey Delivery Service. NFMDS? No ground control needed. These Monkeys know where it's at. Much less chance that a monkey will crash into the hood of your car! And even then, what if they do? All of the NFMDS monkeys are *bonded* and *insured*. Can Jeffy say that?

Drones. Pathetic.


*pathetic: remember Audi unintended acceleration?

Is this a joke? Why are you so mad?

Sounds troll-ish to me. I'll cross on a different bridge, thank you.

I'm all for the NFMDS! Bring back the sixties! Yeah yeah yeah!

I think he wears contacts. His eyes do look a bit off.

Can’t wait for the day. Man that will be better than shooting skeet.

Like a pinata in the sky.

Even better would be Taco Bell, who talked about using them to deliver burritos. The splatter patterns of those will be great.

An interesting theory behind why the announcement happened the way it did:

http://nymag.com/daily/intelligencer/2013/12/amazon-drones-and-pre-lobbying.html

The tech industry is starting to learn the tricks of our sad political system. Will be interesting to see how this all pans out.

SC: Please warn me before you begin testing your NFMDS. Even with insurance, I'd like to avoid the hassle of dealing with damage to my car or home

The NYMag article is almost along the lines of what I was thinking. Of course I saw a tweet on Monday that was much more succinct:

"Gee, if only there were some way to get everyone talking about Amazon right before Cyber Monday."

Yup.

Tom, no worry, if NFMDS delivery agents inadvertently destroy your vehicle, we guarantee we'll deliver a nicer model within 30 minutes. A Ferrari if you so desire. Of course, as must be plain to readers of this forum, anti-delivery conditions exist in some locales and jurisdictions, and those conditions have compelled us to arm our monkeys in those areas with phased plasma guns. If your vehicle is destroyed as part of an unavoidable response to anti-delivery terrorist action, the guarantee of a replacement vehicle or a new Ferrari is null and void. But El Jeffy *never* offers a replacement Ferrari!

Matt, I think you can put your troll-weary mind at ease. Just think about where those monkeys are going to fly from.

OK. now I got to watch the a 1939 movie again.

I hate musicals but I love that movie.

Will you only be breeding your monkeys for use in your delivery service, or will they be available for purchase? I had a capuchin monkey for a few years as a kid, and I really miss the little guy.

First, contrary to some conjecture, these monkeys are not flying out of Oz. They are flying out of, well, somewhere else.

As regards pethood, you have to understand that these are highly probabilistic monkeys and are governed by the well-known Uncertain Monkey Principle. As such, while they make great delivery agents (they can be anywhere at anytime!), they just won't sit still or respect metaphysical boundaries and people have found them to be lousy pets.