The source of this joke is actually from a Russian comic back when the Soviet Union was still around.... It went around quite a few years ago and has only recently resurfaced. I really don't care enough to look up who or when.

Now, if only I had a beowulf cluster of Empegs..... I could then pour hot grits down Natalie Portman's pants, own all her base and profit!

All of these jokes were funny the first time around. After the second, third, fourth, 807th.....